Sunday, April 25, 2010

Im finally bothering to do a 33 things.

cos like ages ago i said i was going to do a 33 things except i kept on forgetting.

and now that ling and jassy have done a 33 things i feel motivated to do one too.

except i probs arent going to be able to do 33 cos thats too much. XD

and i might have done 2 on you. =]

1. Sometimes i love you, sometimes i don't. Sometimes you can be really nice to me and stuff but sometimes you are back to your usual self and not so nice especially when others around. I should be used to it considering i knew you ever since i was born but i thought you changed and was nicer now that your in high school. you are nicer at times but sometimes you annoy me with your sudden change. and you are VERY VERY moody at times and you get pissed easily.

2. OMGSH YOU ARE SUCH A SUCK UP! and sometimes you can be so nice to me its weird, and sometimes you full swear at me for no reason. you annoy me a LOT! and like my parents think you are all nice polite and stuff, but you arent! you are just a suck up. but yeh, sometimes you can be nice and sometimes you do stuff just to annoy me.

3. We were close and all, but i felt as though i was the only one putting in most of the effort usually.

4. Did i mention how awesome i think you are?

well you are uber awesome! and you are very cute. ^^ i wish i was still in your class this year. =] and i used to think you were really quiet, but now that i talk to you more often at lunch time you are way awesome. ^^ and when i talk to you i feel happpy. and goood times cross country this year! lollies as reward! =] cutting across massive strips of area! luvos during cross country! ^^

5. Eventhough i dont know you very well and you dont know me very well. You made me really happy once. You made me feel as if someone cared and just the small thing that you said about come back made me feel special. It let me feel as if someone actually cared cos during that time i was really really upset. there where times when i wanted to not go to school anymore and just stay in bed everyday and sleep so i could avoid things. i felt as if there was nothing left for me to enjoy anymore. But after you said that, i was happy, i felt more secure and as if someone was there that actually cared about me. and i really hope to get to know you better now. =] you are very awesome.

6. you are very funny. and you make me laugh. and i love you a lot though i dont always show that i love you a lot. and you are an awesome friend that i can have a good laugh at things with and talk about awkward things with. (bras! XDDDD) and i owe you a lot and brighten up my day with you weird/crazy/retardness? i love you my awesome hanabochi.

7. you were there for me when things were bad. you listened to my rantings and you were there for me when no one else at school was. you are a friend i can depend on eventhough we arent THAT close. and we better go to chats this holidays cos we've put it off for 2 holidays so far? but i love you and im thankful that you were there for me.

8. i've never realised how funny you were till this year! you are very cool. eventhough you were in my class last year, i didnt know you very well mainly because of a certain someone but now that i know you better, you are very awesome! ^^

9. We used to be really close last year. Like in term 1 and then it fell apart and i have no idea. but its ok, cos we are still friends! and i still love you lots! ^^ and you should be more open? you know you are scary when you don talk. when i first met you, my first impression of you was- WOAH! that girl has cool hair except she seems really scary. =='

but you are cool! ^^ and you are really helpful and sometimes i think i rely on you a bit too much. Well last year, cos you were in my class.

10. OMGSH! I CANT BELIEVE I DIDNT BOTHER TO KNOW YOU THE WHOLE OF LAST YEAR THOUGH YOU WERE IN MY GROUP! =O YOU ARE TOO COOL! ^^

our awesomely coool meditating skills on the bench during cross country!

and i loved the way you 'ran' with me in the morning for PE. =]

the awesome kiddie's playground in St leonard's park (Y)

THE SPINNY THING!!!! the one that ive always dreamed of going on and finally went on.

and remember when i tried to take that photo on the red light pole/post. ^^ good times with jess and me for cross country ey? XD shall do that again nexxt yr? hopefully! ^^

you are very awesome. and i hope to get to know you better. ^^

11. YOU ARE A PEDO! actually you arent. you are very awesome, the only reason why you are a 'pedo' is cos you are the oldest in our group. but im still going to call you a pedo! XD

and did i mention you are very cute cos of your squishy cheeks! ^^ SQUISHYYYY CHEEEEEKS!

12. you are very cute! ^^ which reminds me, why is everyone in my group so cute! this is not fair! how come im not! NO FAIR! you are short and cute! and you are really awesome to be around cos you are quite fun. fun times last year in food tech with our flour fight. and you helping me on poptropica. and i dont love you cos you are korean, but because you are who you are and cos you are awesomely cool.

13. OMGSH! FAR OUT! YOU ARE TOO CUTE! as jassy said in her 33 things! YOU ARE TOO CUTE! except you dont believe us! LOOK AT YOUR PHOTOS! GOSH! SO CUTE! and you are so young and innocent yet you can be so cheeky and naughty? and funnny that you can control polly XD sorta. and i llove your innocence. you are like the only innocent one?

14. HAHAHAH! you make me laugh! like during life saving and things. and dude, you art is so coool. like you lino print and all. AND YOU NEED TO BRING ME YOUR PHOTO SHOOT PHOTOS! one word that sums you up: you make me laugh! a very good thing too (Y) and so much for stuffing up swimming carnival with me. ==' more like, lets swim at normal pace and watch Iris attempt to stuff it up by herself. THATS COS DINH DITCHED ME! =O

15. hope to get to know you are better. ^^ you seem pretty cool cos you watch asian dramas like me! well like basically most of the group.

16. sometimes we are really close and talk a lot and have lots of fun together. sometimes we dont talk much and we dont seem to be close at all. im curious about whether we are close at all. we used to be much closer last year before all the crap that had happened. you were someone that i could talk about pretty much everything to, from my random raves about random crap to the stuff that upsetting me. i guess things have changed.

17. i feel im really lucky to have you as a close friend at times. you have been a great a friend and helped me through a lot. you were once a shoulder that i could cry on. but sometimes i cant help but feel as if im invisible to you. am i really invisible to you sometimes? do you take me for granted at times? and sometimes i cant help but question what you say. is it really the truth?

18. because of what had happened, we arent even close anymore. i miss the fun times we had.

19. i miss you like crazy and i think im stoopid for missing you and missing the way things were before. you obviously dont care. im stoopid for crying over what had happened considering there is no way things can go back to what they used to be. since what had happened, not only did you hurt me a lot, you've left me insecure. Insecure about myself, my friends. And now, im not comfortable with opening up to most people, and i try to keep things to myself from now on. I dont even really want to be too close to other people like how i was close to you. Im scared that they are going to leave me like you left me. i dont want to go through what had happened once again. Left me hanging there and not knowing what had happened. And it hurts to know that you dont care. You left a deep scar. a scar that i hope will one day fade away. i had faith in our friendship. i trusted you. i trusted you a lot. i stuck up for you. and now you go off and tell your new friends that im a two faced bitch. ==' it hurts a lot. and because of you, i have little faith left in friends. i tried to get over it and move on but its a lot easier to say it then to do it. even small things remind me of what we used to be and brings back the memories flooding in. One song that always reminds me of what happened is 'let me be me' by jessica mauboy. part of the lyrics is:

i look at the pictures of me and you we're smiling

tell me what happened to the times when
we understood each other

That is exactly what im thinking. =[

20. thank you for being there for me when no one else was and when I was upset you would be there to talk to or to make me laugh though u dont realise it? ^^ i guess you were one of the only people i could open up to and you are really nice to talk to. you are a good listener? you probably know me more than most other people? or maybe not. im surprised that eventhough i havent known you for that long, i feel really comfortable around you/talking to you. keep staying there for me? (Y) just thank you for being someone that i can talk to ^^ you make me feel more secure? XD

21. We used to be really really close last year until i became close friends with 'her' as well. But now we arent so close. I try to put in the effort but i dont see where it is leading. Sometimes i feel as if we are closer but then other times i feel really distant to you. I want to turn back time to how we used to be. i miss our close friendship. and sometimes i feel as if you only talk to me when you need to. i miss the way things were a LOT! And sometimes i feel neglected? like you dont care. like even though we are supposedly close, you dont really talk to me that much unless you have to. and like you only ask me stuff when you have no other choice. Its like im your back up plan. if someone else says no or what not like they cant come or something then will you ask me. its like you only ask me when no one else will say yes or what not.

its like:

u:hey come come!

person a: sorry i cant.

person b: aww i cant come sorry.

person ?: .............

u: since no one will come or what not, maybe i should go and ask iris.

you know, you sometimes make me feel like crap. like i dont exist.

but other times, i love you for who you are and im so glad to have you as such a close friend. but i dont feel like that often anymore. we hardly talk nowdays.

22. eventhough we used to be close in primary, i feel as if we are even close now that we are both in high school.^^ i love you and miss you muchilyy. =]

23. i like you a lot more than i wanted to. I want you to know that i like you, but im scared that if i ever told you it would ruin our close friendship. so i guess its just going to stay like this. sometimes i drop hints, but i guess you just dont pick them up. i rather you not know and we stay as close friends than you knowing and our friendship being destroyed.

this is all i can be bothered to do! ^^

so guess which one(s) you are ^^

what we could have been, 7:18 PM.